Primary Times - the definitive what’s on and where to go family guide of activities and events for children of primary school age. Things to do with your kids during the school holidays including arts and craft activities, music and theatre for children, parties, competitions, days out, and family attractions along with term time drama schools, dance classes, after school clubs and sports activities. Things to do at a place near you!
Juggling Family Life and Work
It’s the ultimate modern dilemma – trying to be a good parent and a good employee. It’s called a ‘Juggling Act’ for good reason. So what is the secret to juggling your family and career? Unfortunately, there isn’t one. When you are juggling it is inevitable that balls will drop. But think on, if you were single, childless and with no other responsibility balls would still drop. Likewise, if you were at home full-time, dedicating yourself solely to your children, balls would still drop. The fact is that none of us are perfect and things do go wrong sometimes. It’s called life!
So while there is no magic secret to juggling life and work commitments there are steps you can take to possibly make it slightly easier. The first is remembering that at some stage some balls will drop. Manage your expectations. Forget everything you’ve ever read in glossy magazines for a start. There simply is no ‘having it all’ (unless you earn a six figure salary and have live-in help). When you work full time and have a family something has to give, just try to ensure it isn’t your frayed nerves.
Ditch Guilt
Most of us who work full time spend our commutes anxious about the fact that we’re not giving our children or our employer 100%. Hard as it may be - ditch the guilt. It isn’t doing anyone any good at all. Being guilty about not being a full time parent has no positive effect on your children while having a negative one on you. And the same goes for the guilt about work.
So now you’ve managed your expectations and realised that you can’t be perfect at everything (or anything!) here are some tips to try to make the whole juggling process a little bit easier.
Chores
Does this sound familiar – you work all day, every day, during the week and then at the weekend, a time for rest, relaxation and family, you spend your time cleaning, doing laundry, ironing, grocery shopping and generally running errands? This is most of us and let’s face it, it’s not good for any of us. I’ve had my own young child get upset and tell me that I preferred cleaning to him. Meanwhile I was resentful that I had to spend a lovely weekend elbow deep in bleach.
What to do? Well you simply divide up the chores that need to be done and divvy them out between everyone. Once children are at Primary School they are old enough to be given responsibility around the house. (SEE our Childhood Chores on website) If every family member is doing their share then you will be able to reclaim the weekend.
Shop online and get groceries delivered to your door. Let go of the idea of preparing fresh food from scratch each evening. Plan meals for a period of two weeks to a month, cook large batches of curry, casseroles, stew and chilli (the kids can all help with this, chopping, stirring, measuring), divide into individual portions and freeze. You can serve with salad or fresh veg and save yourself a lot of time.
Forward Planning
Mornings! I need say no more. A lot of this stress can be alleviated by getting things ready (where you can) the night before.
- Make a list.
List everything that has to happen the following day – family, personal, work and then see what can be done ahead of time. If someone has ballet or rugby the following day now is the time to look for the kit, not five minutes before you go out the door in the morning
- Owning it.
Get your children into the habit of getting their own stuff ready for the next day, preparing their school bag, leaving their uniform and underwear out ready for the morning and making sure they have the right football kit/cello etc.
- Let’s Do Lunch
If your children take in packed lunches to school, try to get them to move to school dinners. If they refuse, then get them to help prepare their own lunch boxes. Certain items can be put in the night before like fruit and some snacks. Also get your children into the habit of making their beds in the morning and putting their dirty clothes into the laundry.
- What Will I Wear?
Sort out your own wardrobe before you go to bed.
- Networking
This is the buzz word for business but it’s vital that a working parent has a good support network. At some point in your children’s school career you are going to receive a call asking you to collect your child from school as they are sick. For many of us the commute back from work to collect the child could take up to two hours, so what are you to do? This is not the time to start scrambling and calling the stay at home Mums you know. Be sure that you have at least one person who is close by and available during working hours to go to the school in the case of an emergency.
All Work
In the event that you do have a sick child and need to take time off work things may get tricky with your employer. Luckily more employers are becoming enlightened about employee’s needs to balance their work and family lives but unfortunately not all of them. If you have no option but to stay home with a sick child and your employer can’t, or won’t, understand then talk to your Union representative if you have one. Otherwise check www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants/your-rights. Also ACAS (Advisory, Conciliation & Arbitration Service) has advice on their website www.acas.org.uk.